Intimate photos and their link to violence - By Tina Pokuaah

                       

  “It’s just a picture, what’s the big deal?”

 

“It’s just a picture, what’s the big deal?” this was the response I received a few years ago, when I delivered my first workshop to a small but challenging group of year 10 girls. Their normalised attitudes towards exchanging sexual messages, naked/semi-naked images and videos was becoming an increasing point of concern which is why they were referred to our service. Hence the workshop was centred on the dangers of nude image sharing which was commonly referred to then as “sexting”.  Some of the young people strongly held onto the belief that nude image sharing was something almost everyone engaged in when they liked or were in love with someone.  Regardless of the legal implications of sharing nude images, for some of the young people the feelings of love and untethered trust they had for their “partners” still made them to keep on believing that “it’s just picture, so really what’s the big deal?” They were quite defensive and it was at first a challenge to convince them otherwise. Eventually, we found ourselves on common ground after I made it clear that my aim wasn’t to pass judgement or rebuke them but simply to guide their thought process so that they could make better informed decisions.

Our aim was solely to educate and empower them to better recognise the links of nude image sharing to violence, exploitation, bullying, abuse and suicide. To set the scene for an open dialogue and also understand things from their perspective, the conversation was guided by using a fictional character called “Kate”. We began by exploring the concept of coercion which can take different forms including, outright threats, social pressure, or emotional manipulation. Using Kate’s story, I gave them a moment to reflect on whether they believed the first time Kate shared her images was a decision she initially thought of and consented to, or if there was an element of coercion. After a few debates, they all agreed that it was the latter, regardless of how subtle the coercion was expressed. We proceeded to discuss just how quickly an image can get around, even though it was originally shared consensually with one individual. The young people all agreed that Kate’s images could potentially end up in the hands of anyone around the world and used for exploitation purposes. If her images were used in this manner, she would definitely be classified as a victim of child sexual abuse.

As the conversations continued, I openly shared with them how upsetting it was for me to hear about the treatment some young people whom had been subjected to the above were receiving from their fellow school peers. Instead of receiving some form of support from their peers they were being ridiculed and shamed which led to them experiencing feelings of depression, anxiety and even suicide. Like many other young people, there was a high possibility that Kate’s actions were simply a way to solidify her interest or love for the recipient. However, instead of keeping the images to themselves, the person broke her trust and decided to share them with others. We continued with the discussion and I asked them a few more questions i.e. (How do you think Kate felt when she discovered that her images had been shared? When someone is humiliated, harassed, and bullied in this manner, what could this lead Kate to do, as a means of coping with her emotional distress?) As expected, examples of embarrassment, sadness, truancy, distrust, isolation, self-harm and suicidal thoughts were shared. It was clear to me that the young people were taken aback after finally realising that something they had initially said “it’s just a picture, what’s the big deal?” could have such a devastating impact. Fortunately, none of them had experienced this. Still, they had a powerful role to play in challenging and dismantling the normalisation of it. I reiterated that whilst I couldn’t tell them what to do, it was my hope that this very open and honest discussion gave them a new perspective on how to approach such issues. They also needed to understand their power to not let anyone pressure them into sending nude images against their will and not be afraid to ask for help or report if such an incident happened. I also encouraged them to think empathetically about how they would feel if they or their peers were to become a victim of bullying and harassment.  It was important to make them aware of the actions they could take such as, privately informing the victim, deleting the images or consulting a trusted adult in order to receive the right support and advice.

This workshop along with the other hundreds I have delivered, definitely made me realise even more that young people understand more than we tend to give them credit for. Therefore, it’s vital as parents, carers and professionals, to continuously engage young people in open and honest conversations. Although these are often sensitive topics, it better equips them to safeguard and protect themselves, and each other. They are also able to understand and recognise more clearly who they can turn to when things take a wrong turn.